5 Tips On Living With Passion And Purpose In A Relationship

Are you living the fullest version of yourself right now? Are you embracing every moment in rapture at the infinite possibilities that each day brings? 

Or are you on a treadmill, fitting into someone else’s life, buying into someone else’s story, ignoring your passions, your visions and your truth?

One common theme that keeps presenting itself with my students is how many people are in relationships or have come out of relationships where they felt they had ‘lost themselves’.

One woman shared with me how she had just come out of a 13-year relationship. She felt she was overweight, unhappy, had lost passion in life and had not felt like she had lived for herself. 

Now she is learning salsa dancing, going to yoga, horse riding, writing regularly and losing weight. She has re-discovered that she had many diverse interests and passions before she entered into this relationship but somehow they all got swept under the mat.

How do we navigate the complexities of relationships, where there is the requirement to compromise, and surrender to some degree, and yet achieve the goal of living a dynamic full life at the same time?

Here you are with the greatest gift- to be YOU. 

Each moment is a ridiculous blessing. Yes, we have heard the clichés but do we truly live it and believe it? 

When a relationship becomes your source of fulfillment you disempower yourself. 

When you see relationships as outlets for the expression of your fulfillment then it empowers you.

Live fully, in the wholeness. Then from that space of radiance, of inner love and joy, share it with all who come into contact with you. 

You can re-write your paradigm right now, and embrace a life of purpose and passion whether you are with someone or not.

Here are 5 tips to help you stay on track, living your truth, living a life of passion and purpose whether in or out of a relationship with someone:

  1. Meditate twice a day

Once in the morning, and once in the afternoon. If you can’t do it twice a day, try just once a day in the morning. This is a moment for you, to re-connect to the deeper essence of who you are.

  1. Exercise and stretch at least three times a week.

This keeps you connected with your body and feeling dynamic and enthusiastic for living.

  1. Each week put aside segments that are solely for you and your passion

Whatever it is, give yourself a chance to engage with what lights you up. Be it dance classes, surfing, bushwalking, sitting under a tree reading a book, or going to the movies, this is time for you. Just you. 

  1. Inspire others to also take time out for themselves to find their passions.
  2. Be honest and open about your passions and vision for your life. 

Share it with others and invite them to join you on your journey. 

One of the best ways to reconnect with ourselves is when we dive deep into stillness. You can do that easily through my 21-day program Faster Deeper Bliss. Find out why so many people are enjoying the benefits of meditation and doing so easily anytime, anywhere. 

https://www.tomcronin.com/learn-meditation-online/

10 Tips For Better Relationships

I worked for my previous employer for 26 years. Yup! One company for 26 years! Insane or smart it’s open to discussion.

Now that might seem ridiculous but most of my colleagues there were also employees for 20-25 years. We are talking about a money broker (like stock broker) company that employed young staff straight out of uni and even some straight out of school. So how did a company in finance manage to keep its staff for so long? What kept us from leaving to go somewhere else?

I believe they had a philosophy that should not only be embraced by companies all over the world, but also anyone with personal relationships.

Here’s why I think they had the keys to creating better relationships.

Recently I had a coaching client come to me in a state of disarray. He ran a real estate business and he had just had 6 staff members leave his company to go to another company. He couldn’t believe it, he was shattered. Partly because his revenues took a hammering and partly because his ego took a hammering. 

I asked him, “Were you offering them the BEST option available in the industry?” He looked at me dumbfounded.

“What do you mean?” He asked.

“Well, if your place of employment offered the best option for anyone wanting to be in real estate, then they would have no option but to stay with you. There would be nowhere else to go. They obviously left for one reason only, there was a better option.”

I have to give it to ICAP, my previous employer. They knew:

  1. That their bottom line was a result of good staff.
  2. You need to keep good staff.

It’s a simple formula. It’s really not complicated. So they did everything they could to keep their staff. Here are some of the added incentives this company laid out for us:

– A full time chef who made us breakfast and lunch

– Shower facilities with fresh white fluffy towels every day

– Personal trainers twice a week

– Team building weekends away

– Partner dinners for our extended family

– A family Christmas day for client and staff families

– A percentage share in profits paid to us quarterly in bonuses

Yes, other companies approached us all the time. And when you sit down with that ‘other’ company and discuss what they are offering, you weigh up not only the benefits that your existing company is offering you, but also the loyalty you feel to your company for their investment and goodwill in you. It became a no-brainer, and why myself, along with most other employees, stayed there for so long. 

The company I was with was the best option…. full stop.

How can this translate to personal relationships? 

Ask yourself, “Am I the best option for this person?” Or, “Can they get a better ‘deal’ elsewhere?” 

Sounds very technical and business-like doesn’t it, but again it can be quite simple. 

If someone doesn’t want to be with you, ask yourself “Why don’t they want to be with me?” 

It might be a misalignment in values or differences in lifestyles as people change and not always at the same rate. 

But it might be that you’re not offering them a very good deal. If that’s the case, what can you do to sweeten the deal? 

So rather than throwing in quarterly bonuses and some new fluffy white towels in the linen cupboard, here are some other ideas to help you be the best option for them:

  1. Be kind and caring about their well-being
  2. Be supportive in their life and encourage them with their goals
  3. Contribute financially where possible
  4. Be openly communicative, so they don’t have to always second guess what you’re thinking
  5. Bring lots of fun and laughter to their life
  6. Inspire them with new knowledge that you are discovering in your own journey
  7. Give them independence and personal freedom so they don’t feel caged
  8. Contribute to the workload around the home
  9. Be affectionate, passionate and tender
  10. Be accepting of their flaws weakness and vulnerabilities

These are just some suggestions that could help you be the best available option for them. There will be plenty more and I’d love to hear any other suggestions that you might have so please connect with me on Facebook or Instagram. I would love to hear from you. 

If they still want to go to another company or person when you feel you have offered the best option, then there are obviously other factors at play. But start by looking within and asking yourself if you are doing everything you can to be the best option for them.

Have you considered treating yourself and a partner to a retreat?

Our retreats are a powerful way to not only restore balance to your mind and body, but also a way to get clear about your future. 

You will eat incredibly healthy food, meditate, do yoga, receive massages and get lots of much needed rest in peaceful locations. In amongst this you will do workshops and talks that will help you map out your future and learn techniques that will help you make this become a  reality. 

These mind mapping exercises will help you overcome deep limiting beliefs that hold you back from reaching your potential. Attendees in the past have said:

“I can honestly say that my time at the retreat was the most rewarding and insightful experience ever. It fed my heart, soul and spirit and has allowed me to move forward in my life with great positivity. I feel blessed and totally inspired. Meditation is now a priority in my daily life.” Caroline

“The words life changing, inspired, excited, blissful, are only a few of the words that come to mind. I feel lighter and more at peace than I can ever remember feeling. I am free. So amazingly, liberatingly free! Free of expectations and limitations. Free of my past. Free of negative emotions such as hurt, pain, anger, guilt. Free of fear which held me back, and free of that little voice inside my head which kept telling me I wasn’t good enough. Look out world, I’m finally free to be me, the truest, purest version of myself and that version is pretty Goddam amazing!” Sandra

Find out more about our retreats by clicking here

How To Avoid Being Dumbed Down And Stay Light

There’s a saying ‘where your attention goes it grows’. The question is, where is your attention lately?

Each moment of each day our attention goes somewhere, and where it goes, it leaves a residual effect on you for better or for worse. If you move you attention to a scary film, your body will resonate with fear; if you watch a sad news story, your body will resonate with sadness; if you listen to an aggressive song with violent lyrics it will leave aggression and a comedy film, then lightness. The question is, are we being dumbed down by society?

These feelings have a measurable vibration to them as you can see in this scale chart here. It’s easy to not notice how affected we are by the world around us and most of the time we are on autopilot reading tragic stories in the newspaper, engaging in negative gossip, or scrolling through other people’s posts on our news feed on Facebook. A lot of this mainstream content is in the lower end of this chart.

https://www.tomcronin.com/coaching/transformational-leadership-development-program/

Recently my family attended a chanting night at the Hare Krishna centre in Sydney. Ok, don’t freak out, we haven’t converted and become part of some weird cult. The Hare Krishna centre is a beautiful place open to everyone, and each week they put on a night of chanting and dinner for $10 which is a bargain night out! For an hour you chant some elevating chants about God Consciousness and then usually engage in some inspiring conversation with the community while eating healthy food. We left the event feeling high and blissed out. When we got into the car to drive home, the radio immediately came on and the DJ’s were inviting callers the ring in if they have a name similar to genitalia. “Hi I’m Dick Wood.” “Hi my name is Mulva” and “Hi, I’m Eric Shun.” Yeh, enthralling mainstream radio. Immediately we could feel our attention being pulled, almost ‘dumbed down’ and it was changing how we felt. We turned the radio off, but it was interesting to note how quickly our minds’ attention shifted and also how we felt.

If we were to do an audit of our thoughts on a daily basis and then assess them we would most probably find they are not of a very high level. Think about what you thought about yesterday. Maybe pause and just right down some of the 50,000 thoughts that you had, remembering most of those thoughts were influenced by the place that your mind had been pulled into like the media, a Facebook post, or a conversation you were engaged in, ie. other people’s thoughts.

So the question is, how often did we think about God, the Divine, our Higher Self, Egolessness or Pure Love? Or…how often did we NOT think? Did we just sit in Being? Did we sit in Stillness? Did we spend time immersing in no thought and feeling lightness? There is a natural inclination for the mind to be drawn to the lowest common denominator. Joseph Conrad once wrote in his book Heart of Darkness that we have a ‘fascination with the abomination’. I’ve noticed that throughout my life my mind tends to gravitate towards fear and worry. I have to practice moving it higher. It’s not a natural tendency for it to do this. It’s not like I wake up and voila, my mind is on The Higher Self or spirituality.

This is our work and there are ways to avoid the mind being dumbed down.

  1. Avoid or reduce watching or reading the daily news
  2. Avoid gossip and negative talk about people
  3. Minimise social media
  4. Be selective about the songs that you listen to
  5. Be mindful of the podcasts or radio that you listen to
  6. Pause each day, re-adjust your thinking away from negativity
  7. Meditate on being light
  8. Read spiritual texts
  9. Attend satsang or spiritual talks
  10. Receive regular coaching or guidance

This is why I created the Zen Academy For Transformational Leadership, to support people to elevate their mind regularly from the menial daily thought tracks and come together as a community and engage in more uplifting discussions together. This takes place through fortnightly calls and a private Facebook group. We have people join us from all over the world come onto these live sessions.

A beautiful shift takes place when we move our awareness to the Divine, spirituality or the Higher Self…we feel lighter, joyful and love. The more we do this the more natural it becomes for the mind to go there. What a gorgeous way to spend more of our day in that space!

To find out more about joining this global community click here.

https://www.tomcronin.com/coaching/transformational-leadership-development-program/